Week 4 of the "Frying In My Own Fat" Weight Loss Challenge–Better to Fry in Brown Fat Than White Fat

[This article was first published as Week 4–Better to Fry in Brown Fat Than White Fat on Technorati.]

I love that "Bullet with Butterfly Wings" song by the Smashing Pumpkins. The one that goes, "Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage."
Usually, I'm not fond of feeling like a rodent, but after reading about this little study, well, there could be some benefits there.

Apparently there is "energy-storing" white fat and "energy burning" brown fat. Who knew? We apparently want that "energy burning" brown fat. According to this study, our little furry mice friends transformed that bad white fat into that good brown fat when they were "given a more engaging place to live with greater opportunities for social stimulation."

The little furry guys who lived in the enriched environment also lost 50 percent more of their abdominal fat than the control critters.

So since my little weight loss endeavor didn't go as well as I had hoped this week with a zero (that's nadda, zilch, zippo) pound loss and only a one inch smaller waist to show for it, perhaps I need to take a closer look at that study. One writer even said it was "surprisingly simple." Apparently, I just need to be busier (is that even possible?), have more friends (so I now have to be less snarkier?), and more room to run around.

Really?

Now, if I can just get over this sudden craving for cheese, I'll probably be all right.

Frying in My Own Fat Week Three: Yoga Brings Little Stress Release

[This article was first published as Week 3–Yoga Brings Little Stress Relief on Technorati.]

I'm not quite sure if it's the lack of sugar, sleep or just a general malaise from this record setting heat, but quite frankly this "Frying In My Own Fat" Weight Loss Challenge thing is making me just a tad bit grumpy.

OK, so maybe more than a tad bit grumpy.

My yoga buddy, Becky, and I came within a nanosecond of earning the dubious distinction of being the first people on planet to be tossed out of a yoga class. Who knew yoga could be so stressful?

OK OK OK so maybe that's a tad bit of an exaggeration, but if we had actually put our thoughts into actions, let's just say my little yoga crane hands would have poked out Mr. Gumby Guy Yoga Instructor's eyes out, and that would have been a very, very un-yogi like thing to do especially during National Yoga Month.

It's not that I don't love yoga. I do, and with it being National Yoga Month, you can actually get a free week's worth of yoga at just about any place. Which, after my little class with Mr. Gumby Guy Yoga instructor, is a great idea so you can find an instructor that matches you like my favorite teacher of all time, Chris.

I most certainly can understand why people are reticent to sign up for a gym, continue an exercise program and or try something new. You get tired of people expecting you to do things you just can't do, and then chastise you for "not pushing yourself."
Since I apparently have these anger issues, for a fleeting instant, I almost succumbed to one of those slick advertisements and signed up for a fitness boot camp specials from Groupon.

Almost.

I thought maybe, just maybe, it would help jump start me a bit more after that crème brulee fiasco of last week.

Even though those boot camp sites claim their programs are for people of all ages and skill levels, well, just look at their camp videos. I didn't see one person who looked like me… old…fat…grumpy…tired…nonrunner…

I bet they have an entire army of Mean Mr. Gumby Guys.

Except these guys probably yell at you.

Instead, I purchased a nice little Groupon facial.

I figured I deserved a little stress reduction and a little reward. I lost two pounds this week, and I didn't poke anyone's eye out.

Why I hate the French––Week 2: Frying in My Own Fat Weight Loss Challenge

[This article was first published as Frying in My Own Fat Week Two: Why I hate the French on Technorati.]

After my dinner out Friday night, you might as well make me the poster child for the big fat diet failure.  
 

Apparently, though, I'm not the only failure. According to a recent study and news reports, obesity is fast replacing tobacco "as the single most important preventable cause of chronic non-communicable diseases."

I'm not quite sure why everyone else keeps failing, but I'm blaming the French because my failure can be summed up in two little French words– Creme Brulee.

For those of you who didn't take high school or college French, Creme Brulee  roughly translates as "Fatty Fatty Two-by-Four." This dessert alone can single handedly be a diet saboteur, and even that word is French in its origins.

Need I say more about why I am no longer fond of the French?

So now I can only say that, according to the scale I keep hidden in my closet, I have only lost a grand total of two pounds since we got this party started two weeks ago. 

Before the creme brulee debacle, I was down another pound by midweek and hoping to whack off another 16 ounces by my weekly Monday weigh in, so I could report a two pound loss for the week. But according to my cyber fitness pal, if all my days were like my day Friday, I'd gain 10 pounds in five weeks and look like that lady at the restaurant spilling out of her zebra print dress.

OK, OK, OK so maybe my cyber pal didn't give me that visual.

You might as well poke my eye out with a stick of salted butter.

Except I'd probably eat it–all 810 calories.